12 4 / 2014
it’s just so funny how you can just click with some people but not others, like you can meet a new friend who completely gets you in like 2 weeks and yet have a parent or relative who still doesn’t know your simplest likes and dislikes after 20 years. its weird
10 4 / 2014
Is it bad that I seriously keep wishing I could crowdfund a visit from the Cutiepants? Because Yay as of today I have a job but still it’s been 7 months and it will still be a few more before I can afford it and due to things being life and hard and fucking terrible lately I just want to be held and kissed?
10 4 / 2014
I want to dump my brain out here and pick it all apart but that would just mean my brain is open for the Internet to stare at while I am both elated and really really fucking sad.
It’s confusing. I don’t like it. I don’t want it. I can’t sleep. I feel like a two year old and I want to have a tantrum and I also want answers but I don’t and I want to see people and I don’t and I just don’t know what I want.
Well, actually I want my boyfriend. That’s what I want. I want him to hold me and remind me it will be okay but he is in fucking America and I am not.
This sucks. I wanna be happy. I should be. Why can’t I get there?
Even the cuddleswarms aren’t going to help this crazy train, I don’t think they can reach down holes this dark.
08 4 / 2014
Made a huge dork of myself in my chat-home tonight by admitting this no job thing is getting me way the hell down and turning into a crying mess who said the wrong stuff and couldn’t type for beans.
People were kind and helpful in the ways that they knew, but damn, I hated that I got to that point. My chat-home is like my internet safe space where things are just good and nice and I can like not think about stupid things like my life being a total bag of dicks right now.